Okay- this southern raised woman is about to get the stink eye from her Gran from Alabama up in heave. But I need to lay out some of the nitty gritty that is rarely talked about but means so much to those of us who have recovered from an eating disorder. So, please excuse my bluntness. Now, get the kids out of the room and get ready for some scandalous real talk about benefits of recovery.
Here are two scandalous benefits of recovery no one talks about:
1. Great Poops!
If you have ever suffered from malnutrition, over exercise, binge eating, or any disordered eating at all, you have probably suffered from irritable bowel syndrome at some point. Whether it is praying you can make it to the toilet in time or praying for that dang bowel movement to actually come is as common as the guilt that comes with consuming the actual food. Bathroom trips, or lack thereof, when in the midst of an eating disorder are as frustrating as the disease itself. Thankfully, there’s hope on the horizon!
Although it takes a Mississippi minute for your bowels to readjust, your potty breaks CAN be normal again!
This morning, as I sat down to take care of business I had a sigh of relief as my body, without strain, pain, or drain, easily did its thing. It may seem like TMI, but those of you who have experienced this transformation, can I get an AMEN?!? And, for those who need a little motivation, the Dr. Oz perfect “S-Shaped Poop” is possible. Did I make you blush? Oh, just wait…
2. Great Sex
So, I am a married woman, y’all; eight years this June! My husband will tell you that the past year has been the BEST year yet behind closed doors in our bedroom. And, no- it is not because I have the perfect body.
When I was at the peak of my marathon training with rock hard abs, flawless muscular legs, and God only knows what body fat, our sex was at its worst. I was exhausted all the time from training and I would have rather spent my evening crunching and squatting to have the perfect butt rather than having someone I love actually enjoy it. You would think with all those abs and that booty you would think I would be filled with confidence in the bedroom, but nope.
My ED told me I was never good enough. I was too worried about how I looked from that angle, if he felt that flaw, or if I was burning off the dinner I ate to actually allow myself to be in a moment of passion with my husband. You could hardly call it passion… more like a duty I felt obligated to fulfill. Not sexy at all.
I am here to tell you, as soon as I kicked my ED out of our bed, I discovered GREAT sex.
It was not my body that determined my worth in bed, it was my view of myself!
What Does All This Mean?
I found out that I had a voice, that I had an opinion, and that my body was a beautiful way to connect with the man whom I love. Wow- what a game changer. We didn’t need 50 Shades of Grey, we just needed me!!! Once I showed up without ED, the space between us was non-existent. Now, it is not a duty but my pleasure to be with my husband… pun intended!
As I write this, I am smiling… So many areas of recovery are untouched to be politically correct or make others feel comfortable. The truth is poop and sex may be the deciding factor for someone suffering today. The woman embarrassed at her office of holding the reputation of “always running to the toilet”, or the man who is sick and tired of not being able to go… or the woman who wishes she could enjoy sex and connection again, or the man who desperately wishes his partner would feel confident in her own skin-there is hope! It can get better! You can kick ED out and let yourself back in. All you have to do is be willing to try. It does not happen overnight, but good poops and great sex ARE possible.
So grab your coffee, put on your cute panties or your best boxer briefs, look in the mirror and tell yourself that all good things come in time.
Keep fighting for your recovery, warrior!
Image: @raviaman
Brooke, just got to say it: you are awesome and so so right on! I had the exact same experience with my recovery regarding poop and sex. ???? Thanks for writing this piece!
Thank you, Boyce!!! I know this one will be quietly read, but it is nice to have hope in ALL areas of recovery- even the ones no one talks about! Xoxo
Thanks so much Brooke, I really needed to read this today. I am so thankful for your writing here and sharing your own experiences and encouragement!
Honored, Michelle. We all need one another to get through this journey! ❤
Wow thank you so much for this! How long did it take for better poops? Mine is taking months :((