A Poem: Tight Shirt

Tight Shirt

You cling to me 

I try to hide 

I stretch you left 

I stretch you right 

I walk around 

With a fake smile

Nobody knows 

The pain inside 

You cannot cover

Every curve

This is the feeling 

I deserve 

For being so fat 

And out of control 

I’ve lost my heart 

I’ve lost my soul 

Tight Shirt

I keep the ones 

That used to fit

Thinking someday 

I’ll rock that shit 

But all you do 

Is torture me 

I’m constantly checking curve

How you look on me 

I’m never pleased 

With what I see 

I’m filled with shame 

Disgust and blame 

I try you on 

I walk around 

I take you off 

I throw you down

Tight Shirt

I continue this cycle 

I start to break 

I truly believe 

Nothing looks good on me 

I cringe and cry 

say,

Fuck it; I’m done

Throw on a hoodie 

And wonder why 

Why?

Why am I like this?

Why do I suck?

It’s no wonder I’m single 

Who would want this mess?

I go to the fridge 

I open it wide 

My mind is reeling

With what I’ll find inside 

I start to eat 

I make a plan

My thoughts are racing 

I don’t sit; I stand

Until I come to

And look around 

At the wrappers and evidence 

Of the binge I just had 

I feel the shame 

The deep, deep hate 

I lay in agony 

The pain won’t go away 

For I have stumbled 

And down I went 

ED won this time

I am spent 

I’ll go to bed

My stomach full 

Diet starts tomorrow 

Well… there’s the cycle