They Told Me I Would Never Fully Recover. Were They Right?

Ilost count how many times I was told I would live with an eating disorder for the rest of my life. They said I would never fully recover. Doctors, therapists, nutritionists, counselors, etc… the list goes.

I spent years believing that recovery was just this far off dream that some people would talk about, but I was far too sick to ever have that freedom.

Can you relate? If so, please keep reading.

I lost out on typical high school memories, fun college events and wedding festivities. I believed at my core that I was destined to live with an eating disorder the rest of my life.

When your told you’re eating disorder will always be there, what’s the point in trying to overcome it?

Apparently, I had an eating disorder and just had to live with it forever and ever. I would spend my life making decisions that kept it happy while still trying to live life as normally as possible.

It seemed okay to me. It was just my story. But that belief shackled me from true living for decades.

An epiphany

One random hot southern day I was anxious about being off work with my husband because that meant I couldn’t use my behaviors as easily. I was pacing around feeling anxious about this when suddenly I felt this overwhelming awareness that I did NOT want my life to be like this.

I didn’t want to grow old worrying about how many steps I took, how many calories I ate and what the scale said. At that moment, I was DONE letting those things control me.

Regardless of what others said and what I spent decades believing, I was going to find freedom.

It was that random day that changed my life forever. I’m not going to sit here and say it was all unicorns and rainbows after that. It took a lot of hard work to get to where I am now, but I don’t regret it for one second.

So, why am I sharing my story with you? To share this…

Recovery IS possible- for everyone. Even you. 

Regardless of whether or not you’ve struggled with an eating disorder for 1 day or 100 years. The thing to remember is recovery is not “one size fits all.” Recovery looks different for every single one of us.

My definition of recovery is: The ability to live a life that truly fulfills me and allows me to fall asleep knowing I lived each day to its highest potential.

I want to encourage anyone reading this to take a moment and think about what recovery can look like for you. What would your day look like? Where would you be living? What career would you have? What kind of relationship would you have with your body? How would your relationship to your body be?

And now, go after that. Recovery is not impossible for you- because you are a warrior.

More from Alexandra Maffett, CPC, ELI-MP
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