There were so many days (and still are many) when giving up seemed like the easier option.
Many days where finding motivation for recovery was the biggest challenge.
I found inspiration in unexpected places. When sticking with recovery got hard, I turned to my favorite films and shows to find motivation to move forward.
Here are some quotes that helped me find motivation in recovery:
Andy from the Shawshank Redemption started my recovery journey by stating the obvious,
Get busy living, or get busy dying.
Eating disorders are the deadliest mental illness because of the severe physical health consequences. Choosing recovery means choosing life.
On the days when recovery felt as though it took more energy that I had, I listened to Yoda from Star Wars:
Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.
This reminded me that recovery is an active choice that requires all your effort at all times. It’s hard, but worth it.
During my journey, when I began to reflect on my life and how my past played into my eating behaviors, I was reminded of Rafiki from the Lion King:
The past can hurt. But you can either run from it, or learn from it.
This quote is so powerful. I think much of my eating disorder was me trying to control the painful emotions I experienced at a younger age, instead of facing them. Rafiki reminded me that my past does not have to control my future. I can be empowered by it by learning from it.
Shame is a difficult emotion to deal with. Throughout my eating disorder, I felt so much shame that I really didn’t want my family or friends to know about my struggles. Yet, I soon realized that I needed them. Sam from Good Will Hunting, told us that,
Some people can’t believe in themselves until someone else believes in them first.
With the help of my family and friends believing my recovery is possible, I can believe it myself.
In the darkest moments of relapse, I reminded myself of Harvey Dent’s words in The Dark Knight:
The night is darkest just before the dawn. And I promise you, the dawn is coming.
Relapse happens, but the beauty is that is an opportunity to learn and empower us on the road ahead.